February 2012
6 posts
I always imagine having sex with a new girlfriend for the first time is like having your penis move into a new apartment
1 tag
Everybody keeps telling me they have gifts for me...
…Thanks!
Don't know what ya'llz talkin' about
A life of labor doesn’t sound half bad.
I wish Tyler Perry and Chuck Lorre would make a...
It could be called “Rambunctious Black Family with Christian Morals Doing Uninteresting Things and Acting Unnaturally”. It’d probably be a hit, so long as there’s a laugh track to tell people when to; otherwise the jokes might go over their head.
January 2012
11 posts
Had a dream
That I was in high school and nobody wore pants. Bumping into people in the hall got like… a thousand times more serious.
Everyone's always so sad on here.
Try not to get worried, try not to turn on to...
First snow always makes me want to watch Jesus Christ Superstar. Lookin’ at you, Joey Bagadonus.
Ol' Sleep-moan Strong
If I were a homeless man in Washington, D.C.,
I’d be sure to fall asleep so that when I wake up and see my morning wood, it would line up with the Washington Monument so I could feel like a compass pointing north.
ima guuurl.
fapitalism:
All the other kids with the pumped up kicks you’d better zip, better zop, beep boopity bop.
Sickness affects me oddly.
Gonna write strange comments on Facebook all day
December 2011
12 posts
Her name is Yoshimi. She's a black belt in Karate.
Groovin’ the hardest
Stale hot sauce flavored potato chips and hoisin...
I hear they’re callin’ that one a Sam in Tallahassee. (They, in Tallahassee are calling it a Sam. They are not calling it a “Sam in Tallahassee”.)
My room's current situation
Most comfortable bed
endless supply of warm/hot drinks
box of Franzia. Yeah, Franzia.
Silly books
Harvard playing constantly
Still need: christmas lights, every type of soup, snow,
I hear tell of snow in Montgomeryville.
To say I’m excited for snow would be like saying Hitler had a minor taste aversion to matzo ball soup. “Hey, Sam! That doesn’t make any sense!” Sorry. Too stoked.
Where does one go for a ridiculous Christmas...
This shit tastes like somebody else's grandma
6 page paper. Made my point in 2 pages.
Always only the case
November 2011
10 posts
Wait a minute...
There’s a free Harvard concert in a couple of weeks? That just now kicked in.
I know it's not for a while, but I've decided on a...
The ol' tip's twitching for some green bean...
Boy howdy,
It’s been a Chinese week to say the least.
All I want out of life is to eventually have a booming voice.
Everyone's being aggressive.
That and all this Yu-Yu gets my bown yearning for a scrap.
I still don't see the appeal of The Great Gatsby
I'm a lucky fella to have the friends that I do.
October 2011
18 posts
I don't like when people start their sentences...
People need to stop doing that.
Sorry babygurl, col' wata make my jimmy shriv.
Anybody else weirded out by these fucking guns...
The whole day smelled like Dance Dance Revolution
Also, I think I’m on my way to becoming completely mechanized.
Internal clock says get up at 7, every day.
Conscious self miffed.
immortalized with every anguish we yield this is our christening nobody’s listening
Feelin' great.
Way great.